Common Mistakes Even Happy Couples Make

If you're in a relationship, odds are you want it to last for the long haul. This makes learning how to navigate your spouse’s wants, needs and desires an essential part of making your relationship work.
The occasional disagreement can definitely strengthen marriage and make partners understand better how to communicate, problem-solve, and express gratitude to each other. But that doesn't mean any of us like getting into arguments with our partners. And the truth is, many relationship arguments can easily be avoided.
There is no such thing as the perfect couple. No matter how well partners get along, they are bound to have the occasional disagreements. Here are 7 common mistakes that couples make and how you can avoid making them.


1. Lack of Communication


Growing apart and a lack of commitment were both cited as important factors in why couples get divorced, according to this article by the Institute for Family Studies.
Not knowing how to communicate with your partner is a breeding ground for resentment and misunderstandings to grow, which can ultimately end your marriage.
Remedy this problem by spending quality time together regularly. The extensive research article "The Date Night Opportunity" shows that couples who go out 1-4 times each month on a private date night show improved marital communication and sexual satisfaction.
According to marriage courses importance of date nights can not be underlined enough. Date night also helps couples feel more excited about spending time together and maintaining their marital friendship.
This is especially true for couples who have children, as raising a family can diminish parental one-on-one time, and for those who feel a lack of community in their lives (commonly found from close family bonds or religious affiliations.)


2. Expecting a Partner to Change


Marriage courses claim unrealistic expectations as a common culprit in an unhappy marriage. One of the most common mistakes of couples is expecting a partner to change after getting married (or after being together for an extended period of time).
The truth is that change doesn't happen unless the person in question wants it to. So, as much as your partner's inability to pick up their dirty socks or their hurtful use of the silent treatment may bother you, these changes won't happen overnight - if at all!
Instead of hoping that your spouse will become the perfect partner overnight, work together as a couple to tackle your bad habits together.


3. Device Overload


There is no doubt that smart devices are taking over our attention spans. This is great for our online social lives but bad for our romantic relationships.
Studies on cellphones show that those who spend more time on social media tend to have worse mental health. This practice also increased phone-snubbing, or "phubbing" your partner.
Baylor University study polled 308 adults who were in romantic relationships and found that nearly 50 percent felt they were being "phubbed" by their partner.
One Chinese research study looked at the effect of phubbing on marital satisfaction. The results showed that phone-snubbing your partner was a significant risk in decreased marital satisfaction and an increased risk factor for depression.


4. Spending Too Much Time Together


Research shows that married couples experience a decrease in stress and a boost in happiness when spending time together. But this doesn't mean they have to spend every waking moment together in order to be happy.
Yes, one of the most common mistakes of couples is having a "hangout-overload"!
Couples will benefit from spending time apart to work on friendships, spend time with family, and pursue personal hobbies and goals.


5. Not Getting to Know the Big Things


One of the most common mistakes that couples make is not figuring out the big details before getting serious about one another.
Such topics you should know before popping the question include:

Where you want to work?

What goals are you currently pursuing?


How will you handle your finances once you are in a serious relationship?

If you have any desire to have children, if the answer is yes - in what timeframe and what type of parent do you want to be?

Do you want pets?

How will close friends and family factor into your relationship?

Do you want to get married, if so, when and what are your expectations?

Where you want to live?

Granted, a first date is certainly not the time to be asking whether your partner intends to have children or how they feel about sharing a pet together, but it is important to know the answer to these questions before you get in-too-deep.
Otherwise, you could end up married to someone who doesn't share any of your goals and ideals, which can cause serious relationship problems down the line.


6. Not Spending Enough Time Together


While spending too much time with your spouse can cause burnout and loss of self, spending quality time together is still an important part of maintaining a healthy relationship.
Your relationship should be comprised of both romantic and non-romantic interactions. It's fun (and beneficial) to go out on a date night together, but it's equally as important to do things as friends like laugh and joke around.
Studies show that couples who laugh together are more likely to stay married. They also experience a boost in support within the relationship.
Marital satisfaction is also higher when spouses are best friends. Couples who do not spend time together lose out on the precious benefits of marital friendship.


7. A Lack of Respect


Respect is one of the most important factors in a loving, healthy relationship.
Couples who do not have respect for one another will not strive to communicate or work as a team to solve problems together.
On the other hand, couples who show respect for each other's unique viewpoints and learn to appreciate the things that make them different.
No couple is perfect. That's why we've listed these common mistakes of couples worldwide.
Do your best to maintain a happy, healthy relationship by practicing good communication. This will help you plan your futures and is great for learning to problem-solve as a team.
Spending quality time together and treasuring alone time are both important aspects of a great relationship.



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Common Mistakes Even Happy Couples Make Common Mistakes Even Happy Couples Make Reviewed by Neha Malik on July 29, 2019 Rating: 5

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